*Leadership 9-1-1*Jumping hotline*

Nursing school covers a broad spectrum of subjects. Although nurses are held responsible for the physiology of their patients, it must be handled in a gentle manner as well. The undergraduate program requires extensive sciences and psychology classes to meet these demands. But to make sure we are giving our clients holistic care, we must take our leadership classes as well.
For eight hours a week, we sit through seminars on the power of being a leader in nursing. How to be the most professional nurse we can be. Making sure we recognize our leadership possibilities was placed in higher priority than other subjects. Subjects such as pharmacology for example.
Besides despising being forced into boredom and laden with busy work, I question the applicability of this information. At exactly what point is this going to help save a life? When in my entire career am I going to have a patient code and a physician bark at me, “quick, what are three ways you can be an example to your fellow employees?” Where in reviving a patient do my personality space requirements better his survival rates? Obviously I have a lot to learn about nursing.
Fortunately I have professors dedicated to walking me through this journey, or jumping through it when necessary.
Using some of their better judgment, the administrators decided that having a three-hour lecture on mental health first thing in the morning was best for everyone. There is definitely no better time to talk about suicide than at eight a.m.
Luckily they had the right lady for the job. Professor Cat Lady. Professor Cat Lady must not be confused with the Dog Lady. The Dog Lady is like a dark void in the universe, sucking all the patience and joy out of those who come in contact with her. Professor Cat Lady is a soft glow of light, emitting warmth and trust.
Professor Cat Lady was walking us through the reasons for suicide, the signs preceding suicide and the methods of suicide. After two hours of this monotony, we started jotting down personal notes on the methods. Her next power point slide spoke of jumping as a method. She looked around the room and mistook our boredom for confusion.
“Oh, this doesn’t mean jumping as in hopping” she explained to these senior students. “More like jumping from something high.”
Just to make sure that we were completely clear on this point, she began bouncing up and down saying, “see, this won’t kill someone.”
Believing that there must have been a language barrier of sorts she proceeded to bounce around the room chanting, “suicide attempt, suicide attempt, suicide attempt.” She then approached the podium and faced her audience silently. Assuming that we were in fact idiots she wanted to assure us, “that didn’t actually kill me.” The administration has entrusted my professional future into her hands.